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Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Dig Two Graves' (2014)

But make sure they're the right two graves...

This movie is Oscar material as far as I'm fucking concerned. It also touches my hillbilly roots a little bit. So if you want an idea of the kinds of wife’s tales I grew up on, you can watch this movie and get a good feel for them.

This movie feels a lot like We Are What We Are, but actually delves into the supernatural. Like that movie and like Crimson Peak, the atmosphere is just visceral; it's downright palpable. They connect you with every sense, every character, and every setting. This is down to every detail, something even as simple as a hemorrhoid doughnut to get you into the feel of a character.

It’s a bit teen angsty. I mean, that's almost okay, but it was a bit grating at times. You just can't relate to the main character, even though her character is totally relatable. I found myself getting drained by her presence, necessary as it was to push the plot along. I mean, her angst is integral, so it’s really necessary. And we’re not talking about the typical teen drama, the movie starts with her brother dying. I think the actress just didn’t know how to sell it properly.

The acting is otherwise superb, despite this. Like I said, it really is fucking Oscar material. The story does kinda jump all over the place though and a lot of it doesn't make any sense. That will be later in the spoilers.

But yeah. I can recommend this movie, much as it was grating at times.

SPOILERS!!!

Why, on god’s green Earth, did those dopey-ass fucking hillbilly motherfuckers wait almost 30 damn years to exact revenge? It doesn't make any fucking sense. They wouldn't have made it past their teens. Once the sheriff's daughter was old enough to make her own life choices, they could have started there, with her. But for some reason they wait for his granddaughter? Even stranger, they waited for the granddaughter and like vultures, rather than being hands on. The granddaughter could have literally gone her whole life without ever delivering the opportunity. But, of course, we wouldn’t have the story if that happened and it seemed like kind of a long shot.

Let me explain. The sheriff and his deputy basically murder this gypsy husband and wife, leaving their three children orphaned. The deputy was an unwilling accomplice, so he demands the sheriff's badge (you find out they’re both dirty anyways). So the Deputy becomes the Sheriff and the original Sheriff takes in the three orphaned boys. Okay... first of all... why? The former sheriff killed their fucking parents! He straight up raped and murdered the mother. How the fuck did that arrangement even get set up?! I mean, you could pull it off if you addressed it in the story, but they never fucking approach it. It would make a billion times more sense for the Deputy to take in the orphaned gypsy children.

Second, the three children grow up to want revenge against the deputy that literally tried to stop the sheriff from killing their parents and saved their lives... WHY! WHY THE FUCK WOULD THEY WANT THAT?! Why wouldn't they want to kill the guy who they SOME-FUCKING-HOW wind up living with?! The guy they live with was fucking responsible for their dead parents, who literally threatened to kill them, who LITERALLY screamed no witnesses while waving a gun in their face. It makes no fucking sense!

But the rest is amazing. The plot gets a little lost in itself (and they name drop the movie title), but it really is a good fucking movie.

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Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Dig Two Graves' (2014)
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