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Please note - this piece is mostly satire. Take it with a grain of salt. Actually, salt will help protect you from any demons or bad spirits that might come out of your spirit board, so keep some around, just in case.
Last year I gave you six reasons you shouldn’t use the Ouija board, but now I want to talk about when you might want to use one. You want to make sure that you are practicing spiritual safety when you dust off your old spirit talking board. But, if you’re daring enough, you might be able to get some interesting info through this form of spiritual communication.
Before you start, you need to be a believer. If you’re one of the many people that snub their noses at the existence of ghosts or the ability of a “toy” to reach something from another dimension, you're going to have trouble making the thing work. If you don't even believe there are other dimensions, there's no point in gently placing your finger on that planchette. If you fall into the non-believer category, stop reading now—this article has nothing to offer you.
If you’re a believer, here are a few reasons to use your Ouija board (or to invest in one now).
1. You want to talk to a deceased loved one.
Is there someone you love that is dead and you really wish you could reach out and talk to them? Why not get some friends together and have a seance using the Ouija board? If you know some things only this deceased friend or family member would know, you can use that as a way to make sure it’s them talking to you and not another guest moving the planchette.
Remember though, there are spirits and other things in other dimensions that will lie to you and pretend they’re people they’re not (watch the movie Witchboard). It will always be difficult to know if you actually reach the person you’re trying to commune with.
2. To talk to a famous dead person.
Maybe you want to reach out to your favorite dead author or movie star. Maybe you want to reach out to Marilyn Monroe and try to find out who killed her. This is something fun you can do at a party if you happen to have a spirit board just lying around.
3. You want to find something you lost.
Using spiritual communication tools can help you find lost objects. While numerology is one of the best divination tools to utilize when it comes to missing things, your ouija board can give you even more answers—it could direct you to the exact place you left your wedding band or your favorite CD.
4. You want to raise demons.
Feeling bored and hoping to get a little more excitement in your life? Why not raise a demon or two using your spirit board. You may want to do a little research on raising demons before you dive into this project. There are spells, sigils, and crystals you can use to control the demons you raise. Why not put them to work if you’re going to summon them?
5. You’re hoping your house will become haunted.
Always dreamed of living in a haunted house? Using an Ouija board, especially using it alone, could unleash some spirits. Just remember, they’re more difficult to get rid of than they are to summon. You may have to call in some priests and you may end up possessed, so be careful.
6. You want to know when you’re going to die.
One of the most common questions people ask their spirit boards is when they’re going to die. Just remember, spirits often lie—so just because they give you a death date or age, and even if they give you specific details, that doesn’t mean it’s really going to happen.
A Few Ouija Safety Tips
Before you start messing around with things you may not understand, prepare yourself. Do a grounding (this can be as simple as imagining roots growing out of your feet and into the ground). Keep a talisman with you—something that is meant to protect you and makes you feel safe. Don’t use the Ouija board alone, unless you really want something bad to happen.
Ouija boards are sold as toys, but people that actually believe in ghosts and demons will tell you some horror stories that will remind you that talking to the dead is not a game!